"If You're Happy and You Know It" is a popular children's song, or nursery rhyme, credited to songwriter Alfred B. Smith c. 1916. It has, like many familiar childhood cantations, been altered in various ways over the years for various uses, particularly as political rags.

The original song as it is known to Americans begins:-

If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands.
If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands.
If you're happy and you know it,
Then your face will surely show it,
If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands.

In Great Britain, the fourth line is more usually rendered as "And you really want to show it".

Numerous variations of this have been created as entertainment. For example, there is an example relating to the proposed attack on Iraq, written by John Robbins, which begins as follows[1]:-

"If You're Happy And You Know It, Bomb Iraq"

If you cannot find Osama, bomb Iraq.
If the markets are a drama, bomb Iraq.
If the terrorists are Saudi,
And your alibi is shoddy,
And your tastes remain quite gaudy,
Bomb Iraq.

A recent, alternate version:

"If You're Happy And You Know It, Bomb Iraq Redux"

If you cannot find Osama, bomb Iraq.
If the markets are a drama, bomb Iraq.
If the terrorists are frisky,
Pakistan is looking shifty,
North Korea is too risky,
Bomb Iraq.

If we have no allies with us, bomb Iraq.
If we think that someone's dissed us, bomb Iraq.
So to hell with the inspections,
Let's look tough for the elections,
Close your mind and take directions,
Bomb Iraq.

It's pre-emptive non-aggression, bomb Iraq.
To prevent this mass destruction, bomb Iraq.
They've got weapons we can't see,
And that's all the proof we need,
If they're not there, they there must be,
Bomb Iraq.

If you never were elected, bomb Iraq.
If your mood is quite dejected, bomb Iraq.
If you think Saddam's gone mad,
With the weapons that he had,
And he tried to kill your dad,
Bomb Iraq.

If corporate fraud is growin', bomb Iraq.
If your ties to it are showin', bomb Iraq.
If your politics are sleazy,
And hiding that ain't easy,
And your manhood's getting queasy,
Bomb Iraq.

Fall in line and follow orders, bomb Iraq.
For our might knows not our borders, bomb Iraq.
Disagree? We'll call it treason,
Let's make war not love this season,
Even if we have no reason,
Bomb Iraq.


If You're Happy and you Know it is also a forthcoming picture book for children, to be published in March 2003 by Oxford University Press.